I haven't written here in quite sometime. I think it was a combination of being too busy with my job and I was wrapped up in a relationship that went south, came back and then went sour again.
It almost seems cliche to start writing again this early on in the new year, but I have so much to write about. I am anxious for the future, but I am excited. I feel as if I am on the cusp of something, I truly feel something is about to burst wide open for me. I must stay upbeat, I must roll with the anxiousness and realize that within me is a strength that has never left me.
I will admit, I have had somewhat of defeatist attitude since being let go by my previous employer. I was crushed when it happened, but I cannot help some of the tears, were tears of relief. For six years my job consumed me and identified me - something I always swore to myself I would never let happen. It was hard not to let it happen, working 6-7 days, sometimes up to 80 hours a week depending on the sporting event.
I have been on high energy mode for the last hour as I clean my apartment. The blinds are up and sky is beautiful. The music fills my 500 square foot living space. I am in a difficult situation, but I am lucky. I am so very lucky. I was dancing around as I cleaned my stove, scrubbed my shower tub and dusted my book shelf.
I couldn't help but smile. I am on the cusp. I can feel it. I feel awake. Something is brewing and I couldn't be more excited.
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